Redneck Cruise Line-Vacation|Redneck Travel Agency

81

By Michael Willis

Plan Your Summer-Winter-Holiday Vacation Today

Vacation get-away trips are on the mind of everyone as summer heats up or the cold fills the fall and winter months. The Holiday season makes a great time for family events and gatherings. While many vacationers will contact their favorite Travel Agency or search for an Online Travel Agent to book cruise line trips on a Caribbean Cruise Liner, Alaskan Cruise, or a Mediterranean Cruise, there are ways to have the same type of experience at a much lower budget cost vacation.

The economy has affected vacation plans for millions of Americans and that should not prevent you from having that summer get-away for yourself or the family vacation. Families can plan for vacation plans with a return to nature. Family vacations or adult vacations can be had close to home and be just as enjoyable as an airline trip across the continent, overseas or a stay in a vacation resort. It is very cost effective and can be a learning experience. It is not new, but has been around for a long, long time.

Travel Luggage

US Traveler New Yorker 4 Piece Luggage Set Expandable,Black,One Size
Amazon Price: $75.39
List Price: $199.99
US Traveler Rio Two Piece Expandable Carry-On Luggage Set, Royal Blue, One Size
Amazon Price: $37.99
List Price: $49.99
Samsonite 5 Piece Nested Luggage Set, Black
Amazon Price: $98.99
List Price: $250.00

No more having to buy a new vacation wardrobe, special luggage, rental car to get around, tipping a bus-boy or taxi-cab fees. You can just relax, let “your-hair-down” and just be yourself and no one around you cares. It is all about having Fun!

I highly recommend you cancel that expensive airline trip, fancy cruise, resort, even the Disney World or Disneyland trip and check out this place I am introducing you to. You can go through a Travel Agency, search online or a magazine ad to find that special vacation that will be like no other.

Redneck Cruise Line Vacation Holiday Packages

See all 5 photos

Redneck Cruise Line Travel Agency Presents:

“Rednecks on the River-Fest”

Redneck Cruise Line unveiled its latest Trailer Cruise Ship for those who enjoy luxurious trips down the American Rivers. You can reserve package deals for 3 day-2 nights, 4 day-3 nights weekend Hoe-Down or go all out for the 7 day-6 nights Hoop-n-Holler Hick Party.

Redneck Christmas Vacation Packages come with complimentary Redneck gifts and videos made from Real Hillbilly Rednecks.

The Honeymoon Package Deals are great for the Newlyweds looking for that "unforgettable time."

(Redneck AD, by a Redneck!)

Redneck Cruises

Experience the great outdoors on American River Cruises through great vacation packages offered by Redneck Cruise Lines. The newest Cruise Boat is a 3 level luxury liner that showcases the true outdoor atmosphere. You will enjoy the outdoors in a new way on the river waterways of America.

The fabulous main deck is wide open and allows guest to enjoy the fresh air as you travel down the river trails with fine dining and booze.

You will enjoy the nature sounds of the frogs, crickets and whatever wild animal may be roaming on the banks of the river and in the woods.

Special Family Holiday and Honeymoon packages are available. A Family Reunion package can be purchased and catered with advance notice.

Each Guest Room comes with a built-in Personal Grill

Photocredit:redneck_grill_therednecklounge.com
Photocredit:redneck_grill_therednecklounge.com

Fine Dining and Boozing

The Cruise Line Fine Dining menu features great delicacies such as Possum Stew and Possum burgers, Road-Kill BBQ, Armadillo on the Half-Shell (you get to keep the shell…makes a good hard hat to protect you from the sun or a toy for the youngins’.)

And you will find on the menu the redneck favorites, Chitlins and grits. For those who have the taste for “seafood eatin’s,” what you catch from fishing the river can be deep-fried for you as well. The river is filled with catfish, perch, crappie, bass, trout in some areas, turtles and if you are lucky you might even snatch an eel. You won’t find oysters in the river, but muscles can be substituted that you find in the shallow water.

The Reneck Lounge Chandelier

Guest can reach up from the dining table for a cold one without having to  wait for the redneck hostess.
Guest can reach up from the dining table for a cold one without having to wait for the redneck hostess.

Beer bottle chandeliers hang over each table and guest can reach right up to the chandelier to grab and open up a fresh cold beverage. The Chandelier can be specially stocked with guest choice of beverage if requested ahead of time.

Night time entertainment is provided by the cruise staff. The lower deck houses the kitchen and staff quarters.

Guest Room Accomodations

The Upper deck features cozy bunk-beds for travelers with the aerial view of the landscape. String-of-lights made from beer cans allow for the romantic glow as you stand outside and perch over the deer horn railing. Rooms come with full size beds and the bed sheets are made of real hunter’s green or hunter’s orange camouflage material. Mounted deer heads are hung on the walls for decoration and these deer heads came from the woodlands along the river trail

Time for an afternoon nap  on the Redneck Cruise photocredit:boortz.com
Time for an afternoon nap on the Redneck Cruise photocredit:boortz.com

Activities and Entertainment

For the sun-bathers, there is an extension ladder located on the second level to use to climb on to the roof of the sleep trailer. Non-skid mats are available at the Redneck gift shop on board to keep the sun-bathers from sliding off or getting burned by the hot tin roof.

The Cooler Races-Get ready to Rumbleand Tumble! photocredit:redneck-cooler-race-hippyfiles-wordpress.com
The Cooler Races-Get ready to Rumbleand Tumble! photocredit:redneck-cooler-race-hippyfiles-wordpress.com
The Redneck Horseshoe Tournament is a winner with Families
The Redneck Horseshoe Tournament is a winner with Families

Enjoy the gravel barge stop-overs for scenic tours of the wooded areas along the river. The fishing-hole stops are great for the fisherman in the family. The fish you catch can be cleaned and prepared for you by the ship’s cook.

The Ice Chest Cooler Races are challenging fun. The redneck men and redneck women teams race against each other for a "free Keg" of your choice. The races are held in wooded areas along the river on evening stops.

You can enjoy the Redneck Horseshoe Tournament held on each cruise. The winner gets to keep the toilet lid used to make the winning toss.

Night Time Entertainment

The first night events will include the wet-t-shirt contest for the redneck ladies and the biggest and firmest beer-gut contest for the redneck men.The Redneck Karaoke contest provides the guests a chance to cut loose and have fun.

On the last night of any cruise package includes the spectacular crawdad and fried frog legs buffet and a live performance by the band, “Bubba Buck-tooth and the Filthy Grannies.”

There will be a dance “clogging” and “square dancing” event for those who like to shake a leg on the dance floor. For the beer drinkers on the redneck cruise, the “chugging-bash” will occur right after the live music and dance. So, be ready to chug till you drop.

Book Your Redneck Vacation Travel Plans For Holiday Specials Package Deal

Call 1-111-RED-NECK or your local Redneck Travel Agency now to make reservations while packages are still available.  Use the promotional code: Grannie Clampette and you get the vibrating bed for no extra cost.

Redneck Yacht Club

Redneck Office Supplies

Pure Bred Redneck Decal Car Truck Window Sticker
Amazon Price: $1.99

Redneck Yacht Club

Redneck Yacht Club
Amazon Price: $0.99

Redneck Cabins, Campgrounds and Events that are Real!

You can find Real Redneck Vacation and Events information at the links to the right. Enjoy the fun of of redneck games, camping, hiking and the great outdoors.

Vacation is a time to relax and get away from the daily grind. On a Redneck vacation you can escape from the real world for a few days and "let loose" of your inner self. Meet others who enjoy a good time in a setting where anything goes.

Take a vacation where you can wear cut-off shorts, jeans and a T-shirt. No worries about how your hair looks or what others will say or think. Relish in the freedom to sleep late or stay up all night. No deadlines, long lines, traffic jams or over-priced meals or travel expenses.

There are vacation deals for cabins on the lake or on the river side where you can enjoy the basic lifestyle. Camping site are available for the RV or to pitch a tent. You can enjoy the hikes on nature trails, fishing, hunting and a night time of gazing at the stars in the silence or the sounds of nature.

A redneck vacation for a couple, the family or group of friends is a great way to spend quality time together. So the next time you get ready to plan that weekend get away or summer vacation, make plans for a trip back to nature!


Comments

DonnaCSmith profile image

DonnaCSmith Level 1 Commenter 17 months ago

I am passing this hub on to my children!

wilderness profile image

wilderness Level 6 Commenter 16 months ago

I love it! And with fresh eel steak! This sounds like my kind of cruise; book me for two immediately!

Michael Willis profile image

Michael Willis Hub Author 16 months ago

I remember in my youth Dad and I would camp by the river to fish all weekend. And not at a campground. We would drive across fields and hike through the woods to the right spot. I miss those days.

wilderness profile image

wilderness Level 6 Commenter 16 months ago

Ha! Yes, me too. As a teen I had an old pickup with a beat up camper on it. Camp most weekends in the middle of nowhere and fish. Good times!

I still camp, although in an RV, but almost never in a campground. Just find a nice wooded spot off the road I can get to and I'm happy.

SomewayOuttaHere profile image

SomewayOuttaHere Level 3 Commenter 16 months ago

....ahhhhh...brings back family memories!.... :D ....luv the trailer (single wide) on the top of the boat!

DIYweddingplanner profile image

DIYweddingplanner Level 4 Commenter 13 months ago

Hard to tell which state would have the biggest population to enjoy this...yours or mine! Hysterical!

Michael Willis profile image

Michael Willis Hub Author 13 months ago

Thank you! I know people like to make fun and laugh about anything Redneck. But, one thing about "rednecks," is they do know how to have fun!

Marcy Goodfleisch profile image

Marcy Goodfleisch Level 7 Commenter 3 months ago

Love it! Voted up & funny and shared.

By His Way profile image

By His Way Level 2 Commenter 3 weeks ago

lol I'd say this is jacked up but I can't say that I haven't done some of these. Gah..

Submit a Comment
Members and Guests

Sign in or sign up and post using a hubpages account.



    • No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked
    • Comments are not for promoting your Hubs or other sites

    Please wait working